Meditation, Relaxation and Laziness

Consciousness

Oct 28

I was introduced to meditation at the age of 28 and began a well-disciplined approach to meditation for the next 10 years from roughly 1979–1990, the year my life began to fall apart. I was 68 years old in the year 2020 and I maintain a strong, disciplined meditation practice today but it wasn’t until several years ago when I was introduced to the concept of what is called the golden lid that my practice would change once again. I’ll discuss this later in the message.

I do not present myself as an expert in meditation as I have never been a teacher of meditation but my lived experience in the art through all these years is what allows me to speak to you about it, how it works, how it doesn’t work and the reason why I know that when 10 people tell me that they meditate, I know that 8 of them are lying.

But without hesitation, I want to say that I know of no other practice other than meditation that stands the chance of helping you make progress in your life. Meditation is the only art that you can practice but never master and at the same time, become a master. To begin, the reason that so few people practice meditation on a regular basis is because crossing the threshold beyond the abject mental torture of the beginning phases into a practice that is solid, effective and reliable, is because meditation is so damn hard.

The early phases of learning meditation that are going to require 8-12 weeks of practice in order to begin developing a solid practice are as a client described to me one time as torture. The term that I use to describe having made your way past the initial phases and into a practice that is clearly light-years from the beginning stages where you experience calm, clarity, a lowering of blood pressure, etc., the term I use is meditation strength.

It’s simple: meditation doesn’t work if you don’t do it. It works if you do.

Meditation strength is a lot like training on a bicycle. Once you develop the skills, endurance, and power to climb big hills, you don’t want to lose that level of skill, so you stick with it to maintain that level of skill. Meditation is no different. Slack off a week or two and you lose the keen and subtle edges that are consistent and characteristic of a strong practice. It’s simple, meditation doesn’t work if you don’t do it. It works if you do. That is another reason to me and for me as to why once I gain the inside touch, I want to maintain it. The other reason is that I am a better person when I meditate on a consistent basis. And my wife and best friend, Terry, will tell you that.

Going off of meditation is like going off your meds...you realize pretty quickly that something is missing. Overcome your laziness. Overcome your wandering mind and practice. The best definition I ever heard of meditation is found in Shrunyu Suzuki’s book, “Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind.” He said, “Meditation is the clarifier of the cloudy mind.” It was a primary source for me in understanding meditation.

I don’t know about you, but my mind is the worst enemy I face and it was through meditation that I learned to eventually overcome many of those barriers. Notice I did not say all of those barriers.

It was also in Suzuki’s book that he said,

“In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities,but in the expert's there are few.”

Best apply humility and honesty. But meditation is an ongoing, ever-changing process. When I was young, I was trained through what I call a pure approach in which there is little room for self-interpretation. There is a system, here’s how the system works and you must apply the system. So, I did. I was fervent, dedicated, and had a true desire to become self-aware. Once I crossed that threshold into the balance and joy of meditating, I saw clearly why there were certain parts of the system that were insisted upon, from the posture to the breath and I was better off for having been provided no other options for developing a true practice.

But after 10 years of meditation and having one of the greatest spiritual experiences of my life that were a direct result of having maintained a disciplined practice, of leaving my body and being transported into what I would call heaven, I saw through the fog and realized that meditation was not necessary, that there were wormholes in the human psyche, and although I didn’t know what it was that had happened, I didn’t know what to call what I had seen and what I had experienced, I accepted it as an out-of-body experience, thinking that I had died, I simply used itas part of my toolbox for moving forward. But I do know what to call it now. The wormhole that I experienced passing along and through was consciousness. The gifted teacher I was working with at the time, Nancy Willis, of Greensboro, NC, had me recount the experience to her. When I finished, she told me to write down every word that I could remember, to hold on to it, and cherish it for the rest of my life, because, she said, “It will never happen again.”

But it did in 2020.

So, meditation was and became for me when I was young the vehicle of growth and discipline to which I not only became addicted but loved. But not in the early stages which are so difficult and so defeating. And that’s why I don’t recommend meditation to most people with whom I work. Most individuals are simply not equipped to take on such an arduous path. And one of the reasons they are not equipped is because the human mind is lazy and it doesn’t like being disciplined and put under scrutiny, under the microscope. Eight out of 10 people are lazy and undisciplined and that’s perfectly OK but there’s no need in recommending meditation until there is a fire that has been lit in the individual. Being a busy person is not synonymous with being a disciplined person. My first experiences with meditation did not start with meditation but started with relaxation which is very, very different. They are not synonymous. They are both attempts at training the mind but with entirely different approaches,

But setting the stage, the environment for both relaxation and meditation are the same: a quiet room where you’re not going to be bothered, no noise, low or no light, no tight clothing, warm enclosure like being in a blanket, like being in a cocoon, any choice of pillow or pillows to be used to support any part of your body that needs the support, and use the bathroom before you begin so you’re not interrupted.

Timing is vital according to the needs of the individual. Some people are more successful in the early morning, some in the early evening. The timing should be based on your biological swings. But whatever time works for you is the best time. But the most important thing I would stress is being comfortable. Whether you are in relaxation or meditation if you are not comfortable, you won’t last and you’ll become more easily discouraged. If it works for you, then do it.

Now, back to relaxation. As I said relaxation is lying on your back in a prone position. Because this is a terribly passive position, it’s easy to understand that it’s easy for the mind to go south, to fall asleep. On the other hand, this is a great benefit for many people as it is an aid in sleeping, letting the musculature and physical tension go, increasing the length of both inhalation and exhalation, and in doing so lowering blood pressure and a long list of other benefits. But the downside is that it is passive. Nevertheless, it’s a great way to begin to learn meditation.

Now, in my own experience, it was nearly impossible...it was impossible to find a quiet room in the house when you have 2 children and 3 pets and this is where music, headphones, earphones, come into the picture. The use of guided fantasies and certain vibratory music is invaluable, depending on what your objective is, depending on what your concentration is on.

In the early years, I focused on opening my heart and allowing myself to feel the pain I experienced as a child...I couldn’t stop crying and it was a tremendous mechanism for release and restructuring my emotional framework...which needed a lot of work. The emotional encounters were bell-shaped curves. I began with calm, went into the pain and the upset, and then would return to calm again. From my experiences with relaxation, I was well on my way. From there, I turned to meditation which is not a passive but an active posture and a difficult one. I typically practiced in a half-lotus position and I would become very good at meditation.

I learned and know that there is no such thing as a bad meditation. Meditation is what I refer to as a cumulative effect; it adds up but you don’t know it’s adding up. So, never quit, never give up in frustration. Know that every effort you are making will result in a reward at its pointed time. If there is a sin in meditation, it’s giving up. From my years in meditation, I became a master of grief which I would learn from having learned the courage to open my heart and let my heartbreak about my childhood, the disastrous marriage I was in but what I didn’t know was that it was preparing me for the most difficult time in my life.

From my years in meditation, I learned that the source of my depression was the repressed grief I had held back and protected myself from, thinking that if I ever allowed myself to feel it, I would die. No, that was the reason I WAS dying. Grief became a doorway into the divine for me. I learned to cherish it and honor it for the gifts it gave me. Once I started learning to cry, I have never been able to stop.

As time went by, they were transformed from tears of grief to tears of joy. From my years in meditation and my tears in grief, I started waking up and saw with absolute clarity the limitations that were part of my life, of my own doing, my own creation. I wanted nothing to do with them anymore. I was willing to do anything to finally escape them. From my years in meditation, I experienced a different reality, a reality that cannot really be described, a reality for which there are no words. In the eastern vernacular, this reality is known as Sachidananda which means existence, consciousness, and bliss. Any attempt to describe it fails but it is important to try in the same way that it’s important to try to explain to someone how much and why you love them.

In meditation strength when I was young, the distance between the end of my exhalation and the beginning of my next inhalation would only grow to lengths of one minute, 1.5 minutes. It is in that stillness, following the exhale, that clarity would arise. It is also in that stillness that you heal. The body returns to its true nature. So, expand, expand, expand that distance between the end of your exhalation and the beginning of your next inhalation. This is the greatest focal point of concentration.

Suzuki said this of meditation:

“While you are continuing this practice, week after week, year after year, your experience will become deeper and deeper, and your experience will cover everything you do in your everyday life. The most important thing is to forget all gaining ideas, all dualistic ideas. In other words, just practice zazen in a certain posture. Do not think about anything. Just remain on your cushion without expecting anything. Then eventually you will resume your own true nature. That is to say, your own true nature resumes itself.”

The content of your mediation practice is dependent upon your objective but certainly, concentration becomes vital. Whether concentrating on following the thread of an outer event that was upsetting for you to the true source of that upset that lies inside of you to focus on a candle flame, concentration is a key element of all meditation practices to learn to move away from your mind.

It is also in that stillness that you heal.

Speaking of which, if you are concentrating on an object and every time your mind goes south, returning your awareness and concentration to the object, the intent is not to maintain a subject-object experience but to become the candle flame, to remove the separation, to create the unity which I speak so often about in other messages. But again, concentration is key.

Depending on your place in the Gnostic circle or in your astrological sign, you may wish to shift the focus of your meditation practice to those particular pathways. For example, I am in double Scorpio for another week. The midway point was about two weeks ago, the midway point being the most difficult part of double Scorpio. Over the course of these 31 days, I had two important transits that increased the danger of being in double Scorpio. During this phase, it is time to confront one’s shadow for Scorpio is the signal for death.

So, 4 months before double Scorpio, I changed the content of my meditation practice to prepare for those difficulties. It made all the difference in the world. And although I still have 6 days to go, I managed to navigate double Scorpio with relative ease. So, be willing to adjust the content of your practice to meet the outer circumstances. There are far too many areas of content in meditation to discuss but I will remind you to choose what works best for you. The most, above all, most crucial element of mediation is getting your ass on the cushion and being still. Shut up, be still, and the rest will take care of itself.

Another quote I would like to share with you from “Zen Mind, Beginner’s Mind”is this:

“In the zazen posture, your mind and body have great power to accept things as they are,whether agreeable or disagreeable. In our scriptures (Samyuktagama Sutra, volume 33), it is said that there are four kinds of horses: excellent ones, good ones, poor ones, and bad ones. The best horse will run slow and fast, right and left, at the driver's will, before it sees the shadow of the whip; the second-best will run as well as the first one does, just before the whip reaches its skin; the third one will run when it feels pain on its body; the fourth will run after the pain penetrates to the marrow of its bones. You can imagine how difficult it is for the fourth one to learn how to run!”

So, go ahead and be the 4th horse. Work your way through the discomfort and even physical pain of developing a powerful practice by disciplining yourself through the difficulties. Remember, meditation is not hard. You’re the one who’s hard. When the limitations that you encounter in developing a meditation practice become softened and show holes in them, you’re on your way. Don’t give up, fight your way through until for just a moment, you become the moment.

Today, in my own practice, I am enormously picky. I sit on 6 pillows stacked on top of one another. I have one blanket over my legs, one blanket around my shoulders, and most of the time but not all of the time, I wear a toboggan on my head. I only meditate with what is referred to as solfeggio 432 Hz music. Why? Because that’s what works for me.

Do what works for you but do it.

Stop being lazy.

Lazy isn’t real anyway. It’s just your mind’s resistance to being tamed.

I commonly meditate at 3:00 AM in the morning because of the silence in the house that I am afforded. Why? Because that’s what works for me.

Do what works for you but do it.

I call these moments at 3:00 / 4:00 in the morning QCPS: quiet, calm, peace, silence. My sweet spot is between 45 minutes to an hour Why? Because that’s what works for me.

Do what works for you but do it.

Now, I want to speak about an aspect of meditation that is rarely taught and few know about. I referred to this early in the message as the golden lid. I know the phrase “the golden lid” may sound strange and I don’t want to discourage you from listening any further but if you have any interest in either starting a meditation practice or enhancing your current practice, this is worth your time. I learned about this from my work with Robert Wilkinson, astrologer, and cosmologist. The Vedas are among the oldest religious texts written between 1500 and 100 BC, and many believe they are much older and the Upanishads, which are also ancient spiritual texts which are sometimes viewed as taking the Vedas and putting them into practical and personal teachings, both speak about a golden lid which divides the lower horizontal mind from the higher vertical mind.

In the Rig Veda, a verse states, “There is a truth covered by an inferior truth.” Essentially, the inferior truth is the golden lid, separating the vertical from the horizontal. In the Isha Upanishad, there is a verse that says, “The face of Truth is covered with a brilliant, golden lid, that do thou remove, O Fosterer, for the law of truth, for sight.”

Sri Aurobindo stated, “A veil behind the heart, a lid over the mind divide us from the Divine. Love and devotion rend the veil, in the quietude of the mind, the lid thins, and vanishes.”

And when Aurobindo was asked by a disciple, how can one succeed in meditation, this is what he said:

“By quietude of the mind. Above the mind, there is not only the infinite in itself but an infinite sea of peace joy light, etc. above the head. The golden lid intervenes between that which is above mind and what is below. Once one can break that lid, those elements can come down at any time one wills, and for that, quietude is necessary. There are people who get those things without quietude, but it is very difficult.”

And these comments can take us back to the beginning of my comments about the need for meditation.

Meditation is the clarifier of the cloudy mind. The existence of such a thing would for me personally explain why mental knowledge can never arrive at a final solution of anything. I was able to pierce that lid toward the end of my 10 years in meditation when I was young. And while I do spend ample time concentrating on that in my meditation practice today, I am quite content knowing that it exists and that my life and work is centered on transforming horizontal, daily life with the knowledge that I gained from years of practice. I bring up the golden lid because it is rarely discussed in meditation circles and it should be. Imprisoned in the horizontal in our minds, your life will not change until your consciousness does and meditation is a proven technique for addressing those mental limitations.

So, consider meditation as part of your toolbox for discovery, discipline, and growth.

Overcome the laziness but individualize your practice and don’t listen to the experts.
Do not underestimate the growth that will take place even though your practice isn’t perfect. If it works for you, then it works.

And as Aurobindo reminds us,